Will You Marry Me? The Art Of Proposing

The time has come to make the transition for girlfriend to wife, and besides figuring out how to come up with the bling, you’re also contemplating a gem of an idea for asking. Even if you’re sure she’s going to say YES! Getting your future off to a good start may mean getting down on one knee.

While YOU may not understand the significance of putting on a “show” to show her your love, affection, and willingness to make her your wife, it’s important to remember that SHE has been envisioning this day since she first saw Cinderella and decided she someday WAS going to be that “princess”….and she expects YOU to be her prince charming.

While she may not expect you to go to extremes (okay, who are we kidding, of course she does, but it may not be quite so affordable) affordable, she at least expects you to put a little thought and originality into your proposal. Here’s what the professionals are point out as the essential do’s and don’ts you’ll want to contemplate.

Do’s:

· Drop subtle hints. This may open up the conversation about marriage. Maybe even bring up one of your friends or family members heading toward wedded bliss to confirm her viewpoints. No use making such a major investment if her path is headed down every road except the wedding aisle. Make sure you also know, understand and are willing to accept her views on family (yours and hers), children, working, religion/spirituality, and other major issues.

· Ask first. Discuss how she feels about not only getting engaged but also having someone else pick out her engagement ring. While some women thrive on the surprise others are very meticulous about this very sentimental and lifelong piece of jewelry. She may want to be part of the selection/designing process.

· Take mental notes. Examine the type of jewelry she likes or is partial to. Maybe point out a few things to get a reaction or ask about a friend’s ring. If you’re going to be making the decision without her, you’re at least going to want to know what she likes and would be happy to wear. Consider taking her mom or a best friend along for support and advice.

· Get permission. Even if you’re over 21 and have been living together since you met, remember, no matter how “hip”, “mod” or “with the times” your future in-laws, you are still talking about their “little” girl….and they’re probably (secretly) holding onto some traditional values. Asking your future brides parents for her hand in marriage and their blessing shows character, chivalry, kindness and great respect.

· Pick a setting, and not just for the diamond. Consider asking her in a romantic environment that will hold special significance for years to come. Consider the place you first met, had your first kiss, your favorite vacations spot, etc., and remember half time does not qualify.

· Offer yourself. Put your personality into your proposal. Do something creative, spontaneous and memorable. Keep in mind, you, she, and the love you share are unique, your proposal should be too.

· Catch her off guard. Even if you’ve previously discussed marriage, are living together and she’s even helped pick out the ring, you should make the proposal a surprise. Find a moment, a place and a time, she’d never suspect, then pop the question.

· Get down on one knee. Even if you’re not a traditionalist (and neither is she), the romantic gesture behind proposing on one knee remains among the classiest ways to ask. Besides what woman can resist a man groveling at her feet?

· Show and tell. Besides showing her the ring, and vocalizing your intentions, shower her with words and love and let her know WHY. Give her your reasons for why she’s become the most important woman in the world to you and why you want to spend the rest of your life with her.

· Show your enthusiasm. Once she’s said yes, remain just as excited as she is and try to remember this day is just as much about YOU as it is about her. After enjoying and reflecting on the moment, reveal your happiness by including friends and family in on the good news.

Don’ts

· Don’t give her more to bite off than she can chew. Putting the ring in food may seem like a clever idea but it’s been done before, it can get messy and she may literally get all choked up.

· Don’t lose focus. That is unless you have the proper resources to plan it, keep it simple. Proposing should be something fun, and meaningful and NOT something that’s going t cause you stress or to go broke.

* Don’t wait for “the perfect time”. Marriage is a natural progression in a relationship and in life. While you don’t want to rush into anything, you don’t want to procrastinate forever. Once you’ve got confidence in who you each are and what you both want, commit to making the commitment. Remember, there are always obligations and impending accomplishments in life…so, there may never be a “perfect” time.

Will You Marry Me? The Art Of Proposing